With the recent death of Hugh Hefner, I’ve been pondering his legacy. In my opinion, he has one of the saddest legacies in human history. This man started Playboy magazine, which has been attributed to starting the sexual revolution. It made porn more mainstream, so to speak. Porn became more “acceptable” to the point that it is now considered normal and something to be accepted for teens and men to do. Porn changes lives.
Porn Led to His Demise
I am fully convinced that porn was a leading contributor to my husband’s demise. When he was twelve, he was taken to see the movie, Porky’s. He told me several times throughout our relationship that this was the beginning of his interest in pornography. In his suicide letter as well as a conversation right before he died, he told me that he’d hated himself since he was 12 and that at that time he became intrigued with suicide.
Science backs me up in my belief. Testing has shown that watching porn releases dopamine, which is a neurotransmitter that is associated with the learning part of our brain. It also triggers the anticipation of pleasure. The change comes when someone watches porn over time. After repeated viewings, the brain gets used to the dopamine and the body responds to the images they are watching less and less. It can even get to the point that it completely stops producing dopamine. When this happens, the person goes looking for other ways to get that pleasure. Porn changes lives because it changes the brain. (To find out more about these findings or to get help with an addiction, check out the website Fight the New Drug.)
For my husband, he evidently chose multiple affairs and a few other things to find that pleasure or to get a thrill. One of the other things that happened to him was that he couldn’t cry, not even as he was writing his last letter to the people in his life. I’ve been told that this is very common with addicts. The brain has changed so much that it is no longer possible to cry. In so many ways, it seemed like my husband had become like a robot. It was sad to see and even harder to experience.
It Isn’t Normal
It is so hard for me to hear the jokes and comments about porn on TV or movies. So often people make it sound like porn is great for building relationships, good entertainment and definitely not a big deal. I once even had a doctor make a comment, when talking to one of my boys, that looking at or watching porn was normal and nothing to be concerned about. I was NOT happy. I couldn’t believe he was saying this in front of my son. They are wrong. It brings such pain and destruction and its impact not only destroys the life of the addict, but also those in their life. It’s as devastating as that of a drug addict or an alcoholic.
Over time, I’ve found how horrible a business porn is with the “stars” of the shows, in reality, being victims. There is such a huge human trafficking problem that feeds into the industry. I watched the movie Taken with one of my sons to help him understand that many of the women in porn don’t want to be there. They have been stolen from or sold by their family into slavery. So many are addicted to drugs and found themselves in these movies to feed their addiction.
It’s a devaluing industry where women become objects for the pleasure of others. There is no love for them; it is pure lust and degradation. Porn changes lives by destroying them. Don’t buy into the current culture’s beliefs that looking at pornography is natural and nothing to be concerned about. That statement couldn’t be further from the truth.
~ Joanna Lynn
So heartbreaking.
Yeah, it is.