This Blog

I have struggled with this blog since the day I started it, but the reasons have changed with every season. At first, I was just arguing with God on why I should start it. My biggest argument was that no one cared about what I had to say. I then struggled with actually writing what I was going to say because it was beyond scary. But the biggest problem was that when you start a WordPress blog, you almost immediately start getting all kinds of emails about how to actually write a successful blog, how to monetize it and all the “rules” you need to follow to have the best blog…ugh!

I immediately felt overwhelmed. I read what I could, tried to follow the “rules”, and even bought a course. There were all the directions on SEO, length of paragraphs, headings, pictures and so on. It became a big job that felt endless and I constantly felt like I was not enough and not doing a good job. The problem, though, was that I had lost sight of why I felt I was supposed to write the blog.

Through abuse, you are told and made aware that you not only don’t have a voice, but that if you try to us it, you will be sorry. Your words will not only be twisted and used against you, but your life will become miserable. You will pay for trying to use your voice in any way that upsets your abuser (and, newsflash, almost everything that is said that is not uplifting them or not about them will upset them).

However, I felt God directing me to write a blog to find my voice. Actually, it was more than that, it was for me to even realize I had a voice. I have felt that I had nothing of value to say. That if I did say something, it was stupid or unfounded. But it’s imperative to my future and life that I come to understand that saying what I have to say is okay. There is some merit in it. It may not be groundbreaking or even of any interest, but there is merit in its being authentic. 

So much has happened in my life and I know I’m not the only one who has experienced it. However, I have always felt so alone and felt I didn’t have the right to say anything about it. I have heard from a few people that some of the posts I’ve written have helped them to see they are not alone and I’m happy for that. It’s the main reason I finally agreed to start the blog. 

Recently, though, I came to the point that I just didn’t want to do it anymore. It was a burden in that I wondered if anyone cared. So I stopped writing and prayed. I felt God impressing on my heart again that the blog was to use my voice. To uplift Him and to tell others they weren’t alone if they wanted and needed to hear it. Advertising and linking to social media wasn’t the goal. It was simply to write about what was being impressed on my heart and to work through the past while looking forward to the future. 

So this is what this blog will become. It will be me writing like how I think things and like I’m talking to a friend. Sometimes it might be messy. Sometimes it will be short and like why did I even bother. Sometimes it will be long and like shut up already. But it will be my voice. It will be true and completely me. That may not be enough, but that’s ok.

~ Joanna Lynn

I’m adding this link to this post because it is a subject that means so much to me and goes along with what I said before. Every voice and life matters!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ttXoXMBfZ8Q